How seasonal affective disorder impacts me, and how i found my way back to joy
Seasonal affective disorder, or SAD, is something I’ve struggled with for years. But this winter hit particularly hard. After a grey, rainy summer (even the holidays weren’t spared!) and a lack of sunshine, I found myself feeling more weighed down than ever as the days got shorter.
Usually, Halloween and Christmas help me navigate the colder months, but this time, they weren’t enough. I knew I had to find something else—something meaningful—to lift me out of the fog.
What is seasonal affective disorder (SAD)?
SAD is a type of depression triggered by the changing seasons, usually as autumn transitions into winter. With fewer daylight hours and a lack of sunlight, it can disrupt your circadian rhythm, lower serotonin levels, and throw your mood out of balance.
Symptoms can range from feeling tired and lethargic to experiencing low mood, irritability, or even anxiety. If you’ve ever felt a deep longing for brighter days as winter drags on, you might know exactly how this feels.
How SAD affected me this winter
This year, SAD felt heavier than ever. It wasn’t just the shorter days—it was the aftermath of a gloomy summer that felt like it never quite started.
Even when we tried to escape to sunnier destinations, rain and clouds followed us. By the time winter rolled in, I was struggling to find the usual glimmers of joy that had previously kept me going.
Balancing self-employment and life with a three-year-old left me with little time to focus on myself. The result? I felt stuck in a cycle of grey days, both outside and in my mind.
How i found my way forward
For reasons I still don’t fully understand, I felt an undeniable pull to be outside. I craved fresh air, the sights and sounds of nature, and the feeling of movement. Despite the challenges of fitting it into my busy life, I decided to commit to this urge.
I signed up for walking challenges to give myself structure and motivation:
99k in February for Dogs Trust – A manageable yet impactful way to get moving every day.
A 26-mile hike in the Yorkshire Dales later this year – A big goal to keep me looking forward to summer.
These goals gave me the push I needed to lace up my boots and step outside, even on cold, miserable mornings. The impact has been incredible—walking has done more than lift my mood; it’s helped me feel connected to the world around me in a way I hadn’t experienced in months.
Other ways to combat SAD
If you’re struggling with SAD, here are some other strategies that might help:
Light therapy – Using a SAD lamp can simulate sunlight and boost your serotonin levels.
Vitamin D supplements – Many people in the UK lack enough vitamin D, especially in winter.
Exercise – Even a quick 20-minute workout can release endorphins to improve your mood.
Mindfulness and meditation – Apps like Calm or Headspace can guide you through exercises to centre your thoughts.
Planning moments of joy – From cosy movie nights to baking sessions, small activities can brighten your day.
Talk to someone – Whether it’s a friend, family member, or therapist, sharing how you feel can be a huge relief.
final thoughts
SAD is a tough challenge to face, but small, consistent steps can make a big difference. For me, walking became the light I needed to navigate this winter. It gave me purpose, movement, and a connection to nature that I’d been missing.
If you’re feeling the effects of SAD, know that you’re not alone—and there are so many ways to bring brightness back into your days.